User Profile

At some point, you have to be happy with what you have. I came to this realization when I was moving into my house and getting furniture for it - at some point, you have to be ok with the situation you are given and enjoy it. Its your life, and you only get one of them.

Getting more stuff does not make you happy. Getting more money does not make you happy (although sometimes it helps). Getting more friends does not make you happy. What does make you happy is accepting the situation you are in and enjoying life for what it is.

Thats the reality I came to for myself. For my entire life, I have been fighting to find meaning. When I was little, meaning was dorking around with computers and computer games. As I grew older, meaning was showing off skills to friends. Then, around 18 it turned to social relationship meddling and parties. And at 19 or 20, I was Mr. Make everyones life better at great expenses to myself. But I've always been looking for something better - what actually makes me happy, what actually defines me.

My old friend Joe once had a discussion where he described "Fun" as something that happens when "Resources" are limited. Resources can be time, money, permissions, ability, or any other obtainable limiting factor. For example, programming web pages was fun in high school when we were stupid and didn't really know how. Photography is fun if you aren't an expert at it. Alcohol is fun for some people if you are under 21.

My current limiting factor has been time. Never before has it made sense to me that time is money. You can sell your time in trade for money (a job), you can buy time with money (employment), you can trade your time (favors), but you can't change the fact that you are only given so much of it. What you do with the time you are given is important, and just like budgeting your financial goals, you have to make sacrifices on your time to do other activities. The lack of time (due to financial obligations and a relationship), more than anything, has revealed to me what I sacrifices I will make and what activities I will do to make me at peace with myself as a person - what defines me.

So, I am Brian Hanson. I know who I am, what I want, and what makes me go. Those things are:

- Gadgets: As I mentioned, I am not quite grown up yet. I really get a kick out of flashy blinkey shiny thingeys like ethernet switches, rope lights, video projectors, webcams, and remote controls. If its unnecessary but makes solves a probably unnecessary problem to solve, I'll do it. This includes kitchen computers, car computers, satellite dishes, computer programming, putting bluetooth receivers in fruit, or dragging computer keyboards. I'm up for all of it as long as the only point of it is to entertain my teenage side and get a few laughs. Because, everyone needs a way to unwind - some people use drugs, some people use alcohol, some people use gossip, and some people use fishing. My way to unwind is hooking gadgets together and making something work, something new and interesting even if I will never use it again.

- Productivity: I love finishing projects. I recently installed an ethernet cable into my room, which involved some problem solving on how to get the cable from the basement into the garage, then into my room via underneath the carpet in the guest bedroom. I crimped the ends and the end result (after the purchase of some drillbits and ethernet jacks) was a working connection. I was proud as balls.

- Amateur philosophy - you don't need drugs to figure out how the world works (although I hear drugs put down the abstract thought filters that your brain puts in place that lets you focus on real life activities like driving cars) - I use logic and systematic design. The world is a system of people, and if you can understand how the world works you can understand why people do what they do (or vice versa). I like to write about random ideas like that.

- Computer Science - I thought I hated this, and I wanted a career as an EMT (still do), but the reality is computers are the quickest and most rewarding outlet for making a system or a tool of some sort. A home built radio transceiver takes along time and alot of money to make, with little reward, where as a web page can be whipped out in a few hours with alot more communication value than a radio has. And it can be built for free.

- Friends - My friends may not have their life completely together, or have a very good idea where they are going, but they are always there to lend an ear when you need to talk, and they relesh in the simple parts of life - such as bonfires, drive in movies, and trips to taco bell. I chose this group of friends over my more nerdy determined group of friends, because sometimes the best way to enjoy life is to tone it down and relax. You don't always have to be doing something when hanging out, and each person's personality is their own personality and they don't have to be changed. (the nerds would argue about topics like religion or politics and stuff, while my more chill friends just worry about what is the next thing they are going to spend their time doing).

(Friends, continued) One of my favorite quotes is "You are judged not on the situation you are in, but how you handle the situation you are in." Most of my nerdy friends didn't have alot of worry and spent time bickering about pointless crap, and they were all convinced of their superiority over everyone else (I'm smarter than the average person, so that means im better than them too) to the point where they were used to being superior over eachother and ignoring critisism (sort of like some religious zealots I know, freakin neo conservatives always thinking they are right). The people I know are well aware of the fact that they are nothing special except to eachother, and by accident they handle their lives much more maturely than the nerds who end up having life handed to them. They realize the importance of hard work, and relaxing, and the pointlessness of drama and arguing differences. I can't put my finger on it, but I know that the drive is much strong to be a good person when the entire world is working against you with the friends I spend my time with.

Honorary mention goes to Jeremy. He has had EVERYTHING bad happen to him after he turned 18 (he didn't do much to improve his future before then, but just like me I didn't care about my independent adult life when I was a kid, I just accidently landed a good job). He has a felony on his record as a result of a friends dumb decision, he is expecting to be a dad, he has been let go from more employers than I can shake a fist at, and he has totaled one of his cars. He has epilepsy. His girlfriend left for the marines for training for 3 months. He has practically no financial support from his parents, no real room to call his own, and he doesn't smoke pot (which is against the grain for a good amount of people he hangs out with) and HE STILL GOES ON WITH A SMILE. He comes over and is excited as hell to make a loaf of emeralds bread. He always does random stupid shit to entertain us and himself. He doesn't socialize with people he has a problem with how they run their life (Paul, for example). He respects his friends. And he always keeps positive and lends an ear when I have problems when he has things alot worse than me.

Jeremy, is a good friend. So is Tyler, Katy, Emily, Sterling, Annah, Amber & Adam, Catherine, Tony Hawk, my Sister, and anyone I may have accidentally forgot to put on this list.

I am a 22 year old nerd who is always looking for more people to add to the social circle. I spend my time cooking, playing with gadgets, playing with our dog, reading web pages (Fark, Digg), doing stupid pranks (yelling at people going down the road), working, watching good movies and prerecorded TV shows of series I enjoy (Doctor Who!), driving my Prius anywhere from just downtown to half way across the country (New York and back for the weekend), or you know just whatever peaks my interest at the time. The more people I can entertain and make their lives better while I do these things, the better. I never lie to anyone (except people in positions of authority when my liberty may be compromised, such as employers). I think I am a good person.

I can tie my own shoes and like spicy chicken burritos. I can count to 10. Sometimes, people say my shirts are funny.

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